Slow Motion

This morning was a strange one for me -- not in the sense that I did anything out of the ordinary but in the sense that everything seemed to be moving at a slow pace. My commute to work seemed like it was taking longer than usual, then when I got to work it seemed like it was taking me an extra long time to type up prayer requests before our staff's prayer time. It was weird.

I wondered if perhaps this was simply a "side effect" of feeling like other parts of my life are currently progressing in slow motion... I've talked to several friends lately who are all feeling some sort of restlessness, waiting for something or other to happen in their lives to give them a nudge in some direction. Waiting for these "somethings" or "others" is tough.

When I left for work this morning, I turned right off of my street as usual but saw a school bus stopped just up the road with a handful of kids just boarding. I didn't want to sit and wait till they were all seated so I made a u-turn and drove the other direction. I knew it probably wouldn't actually save me any time, but at least I'd be moving.

It dawned on me that I tend to take that approach in life, too. I get antsy waiting for something to happen and I figure out some way to "contribute" to the progress I'm looking for... Even if it doesn't actually speed things along, at least I'm doing something, not just sitting and waiting. And to be honest, I wonder if that's not why God continues to lead me into seasons of waiting... Because I've never really learned to simply sit and wait on Him to act. I still look for ways to at least feel like I'm making progress even if I know I have no control.

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Life may feel like it's in slow motion right now, but the fact of the matter is the remote is in God's hand, not mine, and I can't hit fast forward no matter how badly I want to see what happens next. As frustrating as this can be, I know He knows what's best. I may never learn to wait well. But I am trying. Again.